la triathlon

today anthony did the LA triathlon. we dropped him off in venice and then drove straight to the staples center to wait for him. while he was swimming, biking, and running under the hot sun, reese and i were sleeping in the car. haha. at least we woke up on time to support him at the finish line!

downtown LA

we had to go to downtown LA to pick up anthony's race packet. we also stopped by the flower district to pick up more orchids, and then just walked around the city center for a bit.

last lunch

anthony asked me to have lunch with him in santa monica today since i'm going back to work on monday. yikes! we ate at california chicken cafe and it was delicious. we also stopped by the office to say hello to anthony's coworkers. they were all happy to see reese.

tarjay

another exciting night at target!

gen's birthday lunch

we met up with the girls at CPK in lakewood this afternoon for a very last minute birthday lunch for gen! reese and i couldn't stay very long, but i enjoyed the short time we were there! let's do it again!

lookalike

sometimes i look at reese and i feel like i'm looking in the mirror. some people say he looks a lot like anthony, but a lot of the time i feel like he is just the boy version of me. what say you?

me and the b

i've been dropping reese off in carson for four hours everyday. first, it gives me time to work. and second, it is giving reese a chance to get used to being away from me, and also get used to everyone there. so far so good!

downtown orange

we went out to the city of orange today for some waffles and shopping. it was super, super hot!

ucla family pool

today we went to ucla for anthony's friend's baby's birthday pool party. would've been nice to actually get in the pool. today was hot hot hot!

chuck e cheese pizza

anthony and i both felt like eating chuck e cheese pizza for dinner, even though that's not the cheapest nor most convenient place to get a pizza.. but we used my ultrasound results as an excuse for a celebration. as soon as the three of us sat at the table to wait for our to-go order, we knew bringing reese in there was a mistake. haha. he was all scared and it seriously felt like there were germs crawling all over the place. anthony ended up taking him back to the car while i waited for the pizza. hopefully his next visit will be more enjoyable. =P our pizza did not disappoint, though! yum!

boob check

i had a mammogram and ultrasound this morning to check my "broken" boob. i was sooo nervous. both ladies who helped me were super nice, though, and i was relieved to hear that the right boob is now cleared of infection. the left boob has a cluster of cysts, but that's another issue for another day. for now i am happy to be able to move forward with weaning the right side.

oh boy

we took reese to his 4 month check-up this morning. he's 10th% weight, 75th% height, and 70th% head circumference. it was a funny check up. his doctor was cracking up at how hyper he already is. she thought it was so funny how he already "stands." i told her how he's been doing that since he was in my belly! she warned us that he is going to be handful, but i already knew that the second they confirmed that he was a BOY! mini anthony on the loose!

face scratcher

look what this boy did to his face last night. i was on the phone with my coworker and was surprised to see blood all over his face once i hung up. crazy!

sophie

reese has a love/hate relationship with sophie the giraffe. anthony's coworker recommended sophie before reese was even born, saying that his baby loved her for lots of different reasons. then when reese started teething and using his pacifier as a teether, i was desperate to find something better for him because he would get frustrated whenever he would drop it. i googled sophie and read all kinds of rave reviews. i was so excited to have him try it that i ran to barnes and noble to buy it for $10 more than the online price. i thought it was going to be the best thing ever. well, he enjoyed her for 5 seconds and then started crying and screaming hysterically. DISASTER! i recently started giving her to him again, and he's starting to get used to her. at least now i can have 5 minutes of freedom before she pisses him off. haha. what a drama baby.

big boy

we call this a "serena picture" because it's misleading. haha. serena always looks abnormally small because she leans back and ends up looking all disproportioned compared to everyone else in the pic. anyway, i asked anthony to take this pic 'cause i was cracking up at the fact the reese is getting so big. sometimes anthony and i will randomly glance over at him and have an epiphany like, "oh my gosh i have a son." or sometimes while we're watching tv or something, we'll notice him snoring and ask each other, "why is there a little boy in our house?" or "where did this baby come from?" the fact that we're parents still weirds me out sometimes. so yeah, the picture ended up being even funnier since it made him look even BIGGER!

4 months

my baby is 4 months old today!

hot day

we met up with sebastian and chris (and #2) in cerritos this afternoon. our original plan was just to have lunch at guppy's.. but since it was too hot to go home to our non-air-conditioned homes, we went to good ol' target to stay cool. lastly, we went to jamba juice to take advantage of our BOGO coupon, but there were like 20 people ahead of us! haha. i guess everyone was desperate for some refreshing smoothies!

foster's freeze

i've been wanting to go to foster's freeze all summer, so tonight we finally went. it was such a hot day, so it was still nice and warm during our walk. i love summer nights!

sage's birthday dinner

we went to gel's parents' house today for sage's birthday dinner. i can't believe she's already two! it seems like just yesterday that we were planning her baby shower. haha. and now there are two more babies up in the mix.

mama's boy

weaning has been tough. it's been painful both physically and emotionally. i'm trying to take it semi-slow. mostly, i'm trying to be sensitive to reese. also, i still have a broken boob to worry about breaking some more. so yeah, reese only has a couple bottles of formula per day, and the rest of the time we still nurse. we are both still adjusting to this new routine, so reese has been extra clingy. he only wants me, which is frustrating and cute at the same time. haha.

tummy time

reese has always hated tummy time, but he's getting better about it now that i force him. i'm such a sweet mom.

nap time

i love nap time with the little boy. sometimes i just watch him sleep.

one year later

one year ago today, we found out i was pregnant. it's so crazy how much our lives have changed in just one year. and it's so crazy how big this boy already is.

life goes on

you can stop reading if you're tired of hearing me talk about breastfeeding problems. i know this blog is supposed to be about happy things, but i also want to document the truth. i cried all day long. this whole breastfeeding journey has been one of my hardest struggles in life. after last night, i stubbornly came home and tried to fix my swollen boob again, only to make it worse. it was even worse than it was when i went to the dr last week. i knew it was my own fault for letting it swell up again. so i prayed for God to heal it. immediately, reese woke up and cleared it out. he usually can't do that, so i know it was really God's doing. He has been right next to me through this whole struggle, constantly answering my prayers whenever i ask for help.. but my own stubborness has prevented me from just accepting what's best. the truth is that as much as i struggled and as relieved as i am to finally admit that it's not working, i am also unbelievably sad. i know i tried as hard as i possibly could, but i still can't help but feel guilty and defeated. i can't help but feel like i failed miserably. i can't stop thinking that reese and i are going to become less close for some reason. i keep remembering the sweet moments, no matter how few there actually were, and feel sad that i may never experience that ever again. but i guess this is the inevitable part of life. it has to move on. jennifer keeps reminding me that weaning will be hard no matter when it happens. i kept trying to fight to reach my 6-month goal, but who's to say that i won't be just as sad then? i am only prolonging the inevitable, along with a lot of stress and pain. i KNOW this is what is right for me. i KNOW things will be better. but right now it's just so hard.

BUT, there's no turning back now. we gave reese his very first bottle of formula today. he loved it. that's a very happy start for our new beginning. as jonah said yesterday, it's going to get harder before it gets better, but it will get better. with all the love we have in our home, i am hopeful and can't wait to get to the other side.

toni

casa mejia had a visitor this weekend. toni arrived friday night and left back for monterey this afternoon. i didn't get a chance to spend time with her the last time she was in town, so i'm glad i was able to enjoy her company this time. even when we were apart for a few hours, we both randomly ended up at the same spot. haha! i guess we are just drawn to each other! =P

baby boba

nina texted earlier to invite us to hang out with her, kevin, and their "baby boba" at honey boba. we were originally supposed to go to a bonfire with anthony's relatives, but due to yet another sore boob we ended up not going. i couldn't imagine being at the beach and having to nurse in the car. everyday is increasingly harder. i realized that i'm not getting any better, in fact i'm only getting worse. i've been taking so many medications and supplements, and i think my body is having a hard time handling all this stress. i've unintentionally lost a ton of weight, have mysteriously broken out in rashes all over my body, and just feel unwell in general. i feel like i'm just beating myself up. after a stressful morning, i told anthony that i wasn't sure i could do it anymore. he's been my BF cheerleader this whole time. of course he also wants what's "best" for the baby (breastmilk) so he would always encourage me and tell me i'm doing a great job when i would tell him i'm failing. this time, he simply replied, "okay." but then while i was at the baby shower i started doubting myself again and told myself that i COULD do it. i keep trying to think of ways of making this work. i've considered just closing up shop on the bad boob and breastfeeding from the good one, not caring that that would leave me lopsided. i also thought about just exclusively pumping. so when i got home and had another stressful feed, i decided to try pumping instead. it left me feeling worse and just more engorged. i just felt so lost. i prayed for God to give me a clear yes or no answer as to whether i should quit breastfeeding. and then at honey boba, without even telling her what i prayed for, jonah kindly told me that i'm done. thanks, God, for answering me through a caring friend in a place we weren't even supposed to be.

anna's baby shower

reese and i went to anna's baby shower this afternoon. she is expecting babygirl #2! melissa's face makes me laugh in the picture. right before it was taken, cassie told her that she had something in her teeth. haha.. poor melly!

helpers

i'm really thankful to have so much family nearby to help me out. i had to ask my mom to come over this morning because my boob plugged up AGAIN! it still took a few hours to clear up, but at least i knew what to expect this time. i can't keep doing this. it's wearing me out mentally and physically. thankfully, auntie fely randomly showed up at my doorstep later in the afternoon because she wanted to see reese. she doesn't even drive, so she took the bus! it's so nice to have all these helping hands!

jenn

after another painful day, i was happy to escape for a bit. jenn and i went to yamadaya for some ramen and chit chat. apparently the mama's boy wasn't too happy about that. haha. it was necessary for my sanity, though!

superbaby

as strong as i'm trying to be, things just keep getting harder and harder. i ended up back at the doctor this morning because my boob was SO SWOLLEN. it was scary. my doctor told me it's a plugged duct, prescribed me some motrin, apologized for not being able to ease my pain, and promised that it would clear up with some hard work on my part. that "hard work" ended up being the worst pain i've ever felt in my life. anthony had to take the day off again, and his mom and sis had to come over to help us watch the baby while i worked on my boob. it hurt more than giving birth, no lie. after many painful hours, it finally did clear up, so thank God for that! i just wish i was stronger, like superbaby russ.

peekaboo

i see you.

reese and london

reese and london reunited today at the bbq. reese was quite excited to see his ladyfriend, but she was not enthused! haha. she's like, "next!" he even dressed to impress! see!


his ninong, ryan, sent him this super cute golf outfit a couple days ago! haha. love it!

elyssa's birthday

we went to corona today for elyssa's 15th birthday bbq! i love this pretty, little lady!

teal pants

this is TMI, but today was the first time in a week that it did not hurt to wear a shirt! i got some miracle ointment for my sore boob and it has really started to heal up nicely! to celebrate we went to del amo mall to walk around for a bit. yesterday when we were at citadel, i saw these teal pants at h&m that i wanted to try on, but decided not to because it was super crowded and i didn't want to wait in line. i couldn't stop thinking about them, though, so after coming home from the mall i texted rianne this picture to show her that i ended up getting them afterall! haha. the shirt is new, too. anthony had some store credit so i only ended up paying about $8 for my new outfit. w00t w00t!

citadel

instead of staying home all day focusing on my sore boobs, rianne convinced us to go to the citadel outlets for some retail therapy. i didn't end up buying anything, but i'm really glad we went anyway. getting out for some fresh air really makes a difference!